Archive for group life

Family Integrated Small Groups

August 7, 2009 at 2:45 pm · Filed under family, group life, leaders, parentunity

If one were to search across history, they would find at the center of all civilization a small group… also known as family.

We were designed to exist in community. Community is where we learn, interact, play, and generally experience life.

Think about it… it is everywhere and in everything. Family is at the center of every society that has ever existed.

Though family may be central to community, there is also a need within the stages of development to segregate into age appropriate groups. Within these groups one can connect with their peers, learn basic steps, or and develop important skills.

Enter the Church… Most churches are really great at the family SEGREGATED model. That is, we are good at running excellent Adult, Youth, or Children’s focused ministries. How many are good at family INTEGRATED models?

At Southeast Christian Church, we are in the process of integrating family into some of our small groups. Our goal is to accomplish the vision that has been set forth by our Senior Minister, Dave Stone and approved by our Board of Elders. That vision is to “Connect People to Jesus and One Another.” My role in this vision is to create and shepherd over the development of groups for Parents and Families. It is a unique blend of Children’s, Youth, and Adult ministry. As we move toward the launch of these groups and their continued development, I will be writing about them, posting resources, and sharing my thoughts, successes, and failures with the parentunity.org community. I invite you to join me in this journey.

Your feedback will be a huge blessing.

Michael Chanley

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Children are to be seen and not heard?

February 26, 2009 at 4:40 pm · Filed under cmconnect, group life, parentunity, pmconnect, smconnect and tagged: ,

One of the hurdles to Group Life is figuring out what to do with our children. Should they stay or should they go? Do we include or exclude them? How do we handle discipline issues as a group? Is it any wonder why some say, “Better seen and not heard” then send the kids to the basement and plug in VeggieTales?

There are many ways we can engage our entire family in the Group Experience. Here are some practical ways to make it happen for your group:

Set realistic goals. Don’t expect preschoolers to be able to sit perfectly still. Allow some space for them to move around. Give them something to do that relates to the lesson. It is okay if your teens don’t talk… that’s normal.

Involve kids in service. Preteens are looking for a purpose in life. Give them a job. Have them assist the host or ask them to help with service projects or even reading the bible aloud.

Get feedback. Take time to listen to the perspectives of the children in your family group. Allow them to answer or relate the answer to something they are familiar with. For example, something they heard on TV or a favorite game.

Have a flexible plan. Include everyone in the group experience. Plan your lesson/discussion around the ages, if possible. If you have teens in the room, ask them to participate. Again, don’t force it. The idea is to create opportunities to connect.

Take a time out. Allow the kids to move to another room if they become distracted. If behavior becomes an issue, allow families some private space to talk things out. Discussing this in advance can head off lots of tension for young families.

Start small. It is okay to plan the group experience around the attention span of the kids. Spend the first 15 minutes with the children in the room, allow them to go play, and then close the group time with everyone back together. Keep it simple!

When we involve the whole family in our study and prayer time everyone wins. This is where we model community life and cultivate deeper family connections.

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